By Phil Knapper – Sports Editor The Benton Evening News

Officially, as I am writing this, I have six more days until I turn 40. There’s been no panic yet, no wringing of the hands and no crying or gnashing of teeth.

Just calmness. Really.

A lot of people would circle May 1 on their calendars with a big black marker if they were in my shoes. Most people I know that are turning 40 rank this particular birthday right up there with their joy of flossing. Me, I’m fine with it. Really.

This December I turn 40. I don’t know why but I‘ve become so utterly depressed about it. My 20’s & 30’s breezed by with barely a thought about my age, but for some reason turning 40 has hit hard. It feels like yesterday I was finishing school & today I’m suddenly almost 40. I don’t feel 40.

I feel the same as I did when I was 18. Maybe not quite the same shape but mentally I do. Lately I’ve found myself reminiscing of my teens & early 20’s, listening to music from that time, looking at old photos and talking to my friends about the things we did. Some days are good others are bad. Some days it just seems to consume my every thought & feeling. I lie awake at night thinking of the past, remembering things probably more as I want to remember them, through rosy coloured glasses.

I try to remind myself of all the great things that I’ve seen & done. I’m married to an absolutely beautiful and wonderful person who is my best friend, have a great marriage, a beautiful daughter & another one due soon. I live in a beautiful part of the world, own a great house, and have seen so much of the world.

On Turning 40

Deep breathe in..I will be 40 on Sunday…Slowly breathe out… There I’ve said it.
Ive not quite got my head round the thought of being 40. That is definately a grown up age. Am I grown up? Do I behave like a responsible mature adult? Should I by now be buying The Daily Mail (This will never happen, while I am still able to form a thought! (unless they give away a good free DVD)), worrying about the price of property, harking back to a golden era (The 80s!!!), bemoaning how easy it is for the “Youth of Today”,and saying things like “why can’t they write a proper tune! like those nice New Romantics”, “What sort of name is 50 Cents”,and “Wot is it wit all this txt speak! lol”? The stark reality is that I am now as closer to my parent’s generation, than to that of someone leaving University.
In a desperate bid to still feel vaguely attached to a youthful age I am currently scouring application forms and surveys where I can tick a box labled Age : 20 – 39. I can do this for 3 days only!
I never thought my actual chronological age would bother me, but clearly it does. It is surely no coincidence that I started blogging 2 weeks before my 40th. There is a danger that instead of becomming more responsible post 40, I will have contra reaction and start to behave more erratically. I may even consider a tattoo, although it may well just say “Best before Feb 2007″
All joking aside, turning 40 has made me reflect. My main regret is that I took so long to get to grips with who I really am, and I will never get that time back. I must endeavour to make sure the 2nd half of my life, living as I always wanted to be, are the most fulfilled and cherished years of my life.
Posted by Jenny Harvey (Still in her 30s)

I will be turning the big 40, on June 29th. Now this isn’t a pathetic plea for birthday greetings. Although they are appreciated. No, This article is my take on turning the dreaded 40 years old. So light me a candle, and frost the cake, because I’m going to be telling you all some of my thoughts.

When I was in the second grade, I was certain I would never see forty. Hey, I was only 7 and the year 2000 sounded impossible. Being forty sounded extremely old to me. I think it does for all seven year olds.

I remember Sister Mary Margaret, my teacher, talking about how lucky we would be. To be turning forty, in the year 2000. It is going to be magical, she said. Magical? Was she kidding? I would have to be working, or have three or four kids by then. I would be too old to enjoy any of the “Magic”.

As I got a bit older, still in the same grammar school, I over heard a teacher saying she was forty. I hadn’t thought of her as old until then. I figured she had to be the oldest teacher in the school.

Turning 40 quotes:
“Life begins at 40 – but so do fallen arches, rheumatism, faulty eyesight, and the tendency to tell a story to the same person, three or four times.”
“Forty isn’t old, if you’re a tree”
“At 20 years of age the will reigns; at 30 the wit; at 40 the judgment.”

Yep, that’s right, yesterday I turned 40. Woo hoo! I took the day off, spent it with my precious family and ate a lot. It was good to be the birthday king.

My lovely wife and I were talking about history yesterday; the historical account of my turning 30. I had forgotten how traumatic it was for me. I did not take it well. But interestingly, entering a new decade yesterday was a great day. No fuss, no stress, no hand wringing and no trauma. I stumbled upon a “turning 40” blog today and I got to tell you, either those folks are not doing well or I’m the most well adjusted human on earth.

I would imagine it has something to do with my love for God having grown, my love for my wife having grown and my love for my children having grown. I don’t get warm fuzzies very often (my wife can verify), but that last sentence brings them.

From Fabulously40.com

The Big “Four-O” — A Time For Reflection

Unlike many, turning 40 was not a heartbreaking experience for me.

Instead, I saw it as a much-needed time for reflection and introspection. For sitting back and analyzing what I had accomplished up to that point and trying to determine what should go next on my “to do” list of life. In the process, I came to the somewhat unsettling realization that my ideas of success, as well as my priorities, had changed significantly over the last few years.

While growing up, my parents constantly impressed upon me that family came first. As an adult, that core value remains dear to me today. However, it’s interesting to see how that value plays out differently today than 18 years ago.

Now, the small worries of preschoolers catching a cold have turned into the deeper concerns of teenagers getting into the right colleges, staying away from drugs, finding good friends and making the right choices. Increasingly, these concerns have become a major focal point of my life. At the same time, while my parents remained the backbone of my upbringing, it became apparent that our roles were slowly changing as well. Their health was gradually declining, and my time had come to start looking after them.
I feel very fortunate to have grown up with very young parents and two sets of grandparents. I also loved the fact that my children knew both their grandparents and their great grandparents. My kids learned so much from them, and I take special pride in knowing they had that opportunity. It was sad for all of us watching my grandparents get older and more fragile. But it was wonderful to see my children take care of them and return the love that had been given to them through the years.

Today’s the day I stop worrying about turning 40. Because it’s done, and there’s nothing I can do about it, except remind myself to be grateful that I’ve gotten this far.

Over the past week, there has been terrible news. An acquaintance has been killed, a baseball player died, friends and family both received very concerning health news. Everything I need to put my life in perspective is here. I have been given great gifts. I just wish I felt better about how I was using them.

My misgivings about turning 40 have been considerable, but not rising from a general discomfort with growing old – though, I have to say, that number 40 seems as huge today as 30 once did (knowing full well that in 10 years time, both will seem impossibly young). It’s been this feeling that I’ve been moving backward as much as I’ve been moving forward.

That is really a stupid thought, given all that has happened in the past decade. Ten years ago, I was single and barely employed. Today, I am 7 1/2 years into marriage, with two children and – Breaking News – a third one on the way, a second little boy, coming right around the time the Dodgers will make their Coliseum appearance in March. (Talk about your Moon Shots!)

Wow…..40…. Im turning 40 in exactly 1 hour, 45 minutes. This is sooooo surreal. I don’t feel forty. I still feel like I did when I was 21. My sex drive is as strong as it ever was…My energy level is almost as strong. I can still stay up late & mostly function the next day. So what’s the big deal about turning forty anyways???? I just looked in the mirror & saw the same guy Ive always seen. Sure my hair is a little (ok A LOT) grey around the temples & I suppose it seems a little thinner on top, but I still look like me. Maybe just a little more…seasoned I suppose. Its so funny, in my youth I never really thought about where I’d be when I hit this age. (Hell, Im not even sure I ever thought about hitting this age period). Now I look around & see where I am & what Ive done with my life…. I started out my adult life as a high school dropout w/ a D average. Now 22 years later (damn has it been that long?!) I have a house w/pool & a view, a beautiful wife & 2 beautiful little girls all of whom I love dearly; 3 dogs,1 cat 2 tanks of fish, 2 parakeets & a miniature rabbit. I have owned my own business & seen it flourish under my vision, then destroyed due to my own mistakes. I have owned 3 boats, 2 cars, 3 trucks, & a motorcycle, I have worked hard & have acted lazily. I have lost old friends & made new ones. I have forgotten things I would have sworn Id never forget & have learned things I never would have thought Id have a need to know. I have many regrets…some for things I never tried, most for things Ive done, I have many, many memories both happy & sad. I have broken hearts & have had mine broken in turn. I have become an expert in my chosen career & earned the respect of my peers & my rivals. I have at times past lied & hurt the woman I love & spend every day trying to atone for these through thought & deed.

As I sit here reflecting on my life I realize that this indeed HAS been a journey.. One that continues on each & every day. There are so many things left for me to do, so many dreams for me to try & fulfill. I have always held that life should be what you make of it. Shit happens, but that doesn’t mean it should get you down. For me then…., I will make turning 40 not so much of a milestone in my life, but simply a marker saying “stillllll going”. I think that I will continue to define my life not by where I have been, but for where I have yet to go.

BY BRETT OPPEGAARD, Columbian staff writer

Amelia Earhart was just 22 days from her 40th birthday when her airplane disappeared while crossing the Pacific Ocean. She remarked before taking off on the world-spanning stunt, “I have a feeling that there is just about one more good flight left in my system, and I hope this trip is it.”

Her comments reflect the crossroads of the age. Turning 40 can be inspiring as well as deflating. Most people in the 19th century didn’t even reach that milestone birthday. But as medicine and sanitation improved, life expectancies dramatically rose. So did expectations and hopes. New crises emerged.

“This is the first time in history that people in their 40s, 50s and 60s are caught with their parents becoming dependent on them while they still have children in high school and college,” said Dr. Barbara Ensor, a psychologist specializing in aging issues at Mercy Medical Center in Baltimore, Md. “People in the middle of this ‘Sandwich Generation’ are pretty stressed out. They might have thought that this would be the time in their lives to take vacations and cruises. But that’s turning out to not be the case. That can be depressing.”

I turned 40 yesterday (August 1st) and have to confess to feeling very strange in the couple of days leading up to it.  I suppose contemplative and philosophical – the sort of feeling that you can get when someone close to you dies and for a time you have a different angle on life and reclassify many of the things that you had come to think were important to you.  Inevitably normality gradually returns and I imagine it will do so on this occasion too.

I have nothing to feel unhappy with turning 40 – I have a great life, but there is something about it that is affecting me.  I am thinking back to events that were 10, 20 even 25 and 30 years ago that I remember and amazing myself dealing with blocks of time that are not insignificant and that I have personally lived.

 A friend of mine who is 43 now trying to cheer me up mentioned that 40 was the new 30, and I do feel this had a thread of truth to it so I am not going to spend my time being morose – I suppose I am more intrigued by a state of mind washing over a normally very clear-thinking individual which is purely the arrival at this milestone.  Another mitigating factor is that I have certainly done some hair-brain things in my time and it’s actually quite an achievement in the light of some of those escapades to have achieved it at all.

It occurred to me on the 21st that, wow, I would be 40 in exactly 1 month. And I was thinking, which is rather a rare occurrence these days as I’m moving too fast to actually thing anymore, and decided that a good way to lead up to the big 4-0 is to share some history here and there over the next month.

So, here it goes…

My first school experiences:

When I was in high school I swam competitively.  I swam the 100 yard backstroke. The strategy for winning that race consisted of 3 things:

1. A strong start
2. An excellent third lap
3. Not dieing on the last 15 yards

So, today (and the next stage of life) is all about coming out of the second flip turn and having an excellent third lap. Need I say anymore?

A review of the recent movie Music and Lyrics explains how it is “…for those of us 40-somethings who lived through the past 25 years in utter denial…the film is a self-help book wrapped up in catchy pop music and lyrics.”

It is 2006 – The Year of The Dog, The Year of the Round-Toed Pump and, most importantly, the year that many of my friends, former schoolmates and I turn 40 years old. One by one, each of us from the Class of 1985 will fall like dominos, crossing over from the last thread of youth that some of us are hanging on to for dear life, to an age where we must finally face what we truly are – adults!

This birthday is different. It is not like when we turned 25 or even the once-dreaded 30 – it’s forty! At what point after your last birthday did you start trying to be ‘okay’ with turning 40? How many times have you asked yourself “Who would have thought?” when you realized you would actually soon reach an age that we once thought of as ‘old’? I can hardly believe it myself. Nevertheless, there’s absoluteley nothing we can do about it, so we might as well take this time to reflect on the people we have developed into over these past 40 years, the achievements we have made and the goals we look forward to pursuing.

All these years have taken us on different turns – for some of us, to parts unknown and places unimaginable, like marriage, children, divorce, and in many cases, the brave venture into remarriage. Many of our peers who we assumed would be successfull in their chosen careers have not disappointed us, while others, who seemingly had potential when we were younger and dreaming of our futures, have surprise us by not taking full advantage of their talents. Some have endured heart-wrenching, tumultuous relationships in their pasts, some are single and enjoying their freedom and independence, reaping the well deserved benefits of jobs and careers and accepting the fact that not everyone is meant to follow a textbook version of what life is supposed to be.