Our pastor usually points out the significance of any numbers used in the Bible passage we are studying. God is a God of order and purpose and has significance in all that He does, even the numbers. I thought I’d look up 40 to see what meaning it has in the Bible. After reading several websites (with a grain of salt of course), the consensus seems to be that forty is the number that symbolizes a trial. It’s a number used a lot in both Old and New Testament–it rained forty days during the flood, Moses was 40 years in Egypt, 40 in Midian, and led the people in the wilderness for 40 years as well. He was on the mountain receiving the Law from God (twice).  There are forty years of “probation” under trials, under enlarged dominion (David and Solomon), under prosperity (Gideon), under humiliation (under Saul and the Philistines). Jesus was tempted for forty days and seen by his disciples for forty days after his resurrection. Lots of 40′s.

SO what does this mean? Ummm…I don’t really know. Perhaps the first 40 years were probation or testing to get me ready for the next 40? Maybe. I’m sure it doesn’t mean the testing is over:). It’s certainly been a busy 40 years. I became a believer in Jesus, graduated high school and college, got married, had four kids. Walked with my husband through the trials of infertility, miscarriage, job loss.

I’ve become more comfortable in my own skin, yet less comfortable living here in this world. I have many more imperfections than I ever thought I did when I was a teenager–nothing brings those out more than having children and the Holy Spirit with a sense of humor  . I am much more aware of how little I know about anything and everything in this world. I do not have a picture perfect life–I can be grumpy, I’m rather opinionated, I struggle daily with some sort of messiness/clutter issue and I’d rather read a book or bake bread than exercise.

But I do know one thing: Jesus walks with me every step of the way. There is evidence of Him in every facet of my life and I know He will never leave me or forsake me. I know I am a vapor, and a rather messy one at that–and He loves me anyway.

My pumpkin scones are in the freezer, ready for my husband and children to bake for me in the morning. I’m anticipating many homemade cards from my sweet ones and interesting gifts from The Dollar Tree, picked out in love; breakfast in bed after a very long wait while it is prepared with lots of “shushing” and arguments and giggles (and prayers by me that is actually makes it to the bed without ending up on the hall floor). I’m looking forward to turning forty and any blessings the Lord would pour out, should He choose. I’m thankful for the first forty years I’ve had and can’t wait to see what He has planned for the next.

The thought of turning forty didn’t make me feel old until I realized that my life had a lengthy timeline of recorded music.

Via Dillard 57: This year was a big birthday, a life turning point. Moreover, I’m not the type of person who keeps her age a secret. I don’t care if people know my age, and I don’t feel shame about my age. I think getting older is ok. So turning 40 was not a secret, nor was it a birthday I particularly felt I needed to celebrate in a big way. I told family and friends that I have gotten so much love and support and generosity with my wedding and the birth of the Peanut, that I did not need any more parties or presents. I celebrated with Mr. Right on the day, and then the next day both me and the Peanut were sick so we laid pretty low. Whoopee! We are Party People.

Being the overly introspective type, nonetheless, this landmark birthday does give me pause.What does it mean to turn 40? What does it mean to move into this new decade? I didn’t want to let this one go by without a good ponder. And my dear friend Tina feels like I am some sort of trailblazer as I am a year older than her to the week, and one year older as a momma. She called me last night to remind me that I had not yet shared my musings. I was so honored that she even wanted to hear them that I am trying to oblige her now.

I asked a few of my personal trailblazers: how was or is the 40^th decade? And what was your favorite decade? I received the expected mix of answers, but almost all of them asserted that the 40s are a good decade, a year of coming into to your power as a woman, especially. I like that.By 40, you finally feel confident enough of yourself to be yourself. And to like yourself. And to know what you need and when you need it and then go and get it. I like all of this. I can see why it would be true.

I am a little sorry to leave my 30s behind though. The first 5 years of 30 were pretty good. I had an extremely fulfilling run as “Urban Artistic Single Woman” who was all hip and had all kinds of adventures and had freedom and a large community of friends and activities.. I miss my very sweet apartment, the 3^rd floor of a triple decker in Somerville, filled with sunshine and my artwork and my cat and my books. My time was my own – a concept I suppose you never appreciate until it’s gone. Then I met Mr. Right and oh my goodness, it has been a whirlwind ever since. I won’t bother tracking all the changes (most of which have been tracked in this blog), but let’s just say I’ve gone from “Urban Artistic Single Woman” to “Suburban Exhausted Working Mom Who Can Barely See Straight.” In some ways, all my childhood dreams have come true. And in some ways, the transition has been one of the two toughest times of my life. My world is definitely much smaller and much more chaotic. I also think becoming a new mom later in life has its advantages (maturity, gratitude, stability, lots of friends with help and advice) and some disadvantages (less stamina is a big one). So my age does have an impact on my parenting.

I’ve always envisioned my 45 year old self as this wise person who looks back in time at me and smiles, both a little ruefully at all the flailing about I do, but also with encouragement. That it will turn out OK, that I’m doing fine, that it will be fine in 10 years … now 5 years. She looks calm and has found the place where I need to be. So now I’m that much closer to finding her, even if I feel like I’m a bit frayed around the edges these days. So yes, 40 is just fine with me.

Via Notorious Rob.com There was a time when I thought 40 was the end. I was probably 19 or so, drunk on the peculiar poetry of youth, philosophical in the way that only the semi-mature can be, and caught in the strange shadowlands between the unbounded world-is-your-oyster optimism and the soul-killing despair at the evils of the world.

40? Might as well be dead.

All young men, perhaps, wish to be Achilles: heroic, strong, beautiful, foolhardy, passionate, burning like a flame, and passing on in the flower of their youth. The smarter and luckier of us perhaps find our way to becoming Odysseus: canny, wise, old, and finding happiness in the simple joys of hearth and home.

So here I am at the magical age. The day doesn’t feel any different from any other day. The heavens did not open up with significant signs. The earth did not move, since I don’t live in California. Or Washington DC. But I can’t help but reflect on a few things, especially with literally dozens of people on Facebook wishing me a happy birthday. Consider this my heartfelt thanks to all of you.

Hunger, and Satisfaction

The strangest thing about reflecting on the 40 milestone is the sense of being satisfied and hungry at the same time.

I think of my 20′s as the Age of Hunger. I had just graduated. The whole world was open before me with limitless opportunities. I was a smart young man in the Big City. Not having come from wealth (actually, we lived in a whole other zip code from wealth, in parts of town the smart people program their GPS to avoid), all I knew in my 20′s was hunger, ambition, desire. To prove myself. To learn more. To achieve something, and then achieve the next thing. It’s the beautiful, bountiful, bodacious energy of youth.

I crossed the threshold into 30 and felt as if I had finally grown up. I have since been disabused of that notion, and have actively sought to go backwards as much as possible, but… the 30′s were a calm decade marked more by satisfaction at what I had achieved in my 20′s, what I had learned in that decade of life, and some of the accomplishments. I got married. I became a father. I found professional happiness at some wonderful companies, and had edifying experiences at one or two really crappy companies. It is as if a young colt found its legs, pranced around enough, and came to realize… “Oh, so this is how I run!”

At 40, however, a man realizes that somewhere between half to two-thirds of his life (depending on your lifestyle, healthy habits or lack thereof, and so on) is behind him. One can’t help but look backwards, at least briefly, as if over the shoulder at a shadow seen out of the corner of the eye. And the thinking man can’t help wonder, just what is it that I have accomplished with these four decades on this earth? And asking that question, I am caught up in the juxtaposition of satisfaction and a newfound ambition.

Ambition, hunger — these are rekindled because the accomplishments, no matter how great and interesting, are firmly in the past. To simply follow that path from the bygone days of memory to the present and into the road ahead is… fine. But there’s something unsettling about the idea. It’s as if I am surrendering to the idea that my best days are behind me: I’ve scratched and clawed and fought and climbed my way to this place, and I am ready to coast a while now. Maybe such a path is eminently sensible, but having spent my later 30′s learning that I really haven’t grown up all that much yet, I’m not ready to call it a Job Well Done. Not yet. No, like Dylan Thomas, I will rage against the dying of the light. Whatever it is that I have learned, whatever skills I have honed, whatever hard-earned wisdom I have gained (for each jot and tittle of which I have paid, and paid, and paid again)… I see as not accomplishments in and of themselves, but preparation for whatever it is that lies ahead. I find that I am hungry again.

But at the same time, sitting at dinner listening to my two little sons sing me happy birthday with total disregard for tune, tonality, and the laws of music… I can’t help but be satisfied. Running around on a typical busy Wednesday, but fielding calls with my agent, with the builder, with the mortgage people, all working on our new home, and knowing that we have built a certain amount of financial security… it is well nigh impossible for a poor immigrant kid from the ghetto not to feel blessed at the life I have. Throughout the day, being able to get on the phone with business associates and people I respect so much in our quirky, strange, twisted little industry, and know that they consider me a colleague… it is impossible not to feel a sense of satisfaction.

And most of all, getting phone calls and Facebook messages, and emails and tweets throughout the day (while I was out running around on a typically busy Wednesday), I can’t help but be satisfied at the people I’ve met over these four decades of journey, struggle, and accomplishment… I can’t help but be pleased at having friends both old and new, and friends I have not yet met. Some of the greatest human beings on the planet, I have met in the past few years… quite a few of them because of this blog and these too-long ramblings. I can’t even help but be pleased at the few enemies I have made along the way, for who they are, and what they are, define me as well.

So let me say this: all of you who are reading this right now, you honor me. With your attention, sometimes with your comments, rarely with your insults, and often with your friendship. You make life interesting, challenging, fun, and make the journey just a little bit easier. To the haters — you also honor me with your hate, for you are beneath contempt and the praise of low characters is worthless indeed.

So thank you all. Today, I am well satisfied with my blessed life. And yet, I hunger again. The spark is rekindled into an open flame.

Watch what happens from now. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

I look forward to making that journey over the next decade with you all. I got nothing but love 4 you.

http://www.notorious-rob.com/

But it’s just not true. Those toys, video game icons, and pop-culture references are from my youth, but the conscious years, not the zygote years.

Having said that, there ARE some cool things/people turning 40 this year, right along with me. John Lennon’s song Imagine. Clint Eastwood’s Dirty Harry. And my girl Mary J Blige hits the big 4-0 right alongside me this year.

In honor of facing 40 on Sunday, I decided to stroll down memory lane and celebrate 40 of my Greatest Hits (and a few Misses) of my life in progress, lived out loud…

1. At age 6, scoring a Barbie dream house (the one with the Pink elevator) for Christmas, one of many fave memories from a childhood filled with Barbie

2. At age 7, watching the movie Grease in the theater with my mom, and as the end credits rolled, hearing her say, “In real life, he’d change for her.”

3. Following my globetrotting parents around the world, living on three continents (North America, Australia, Asia) before I was 10

4. Begging my parents for a ventriloquist doll named Lester for Christmas, unwrapping him with glee, and insisting on entertaining my parents friends (and bosses!) with a comedy set that always started with, “OK, Joke Time!”

5. At age 12, mistaking a moat for a puddle during a Sri Lankan downpour (stepping in, plummeting, and resurfacing to the shock and awe of onlookers)

6. At 15, falling in love with Rebel, a creative, fun loving, new waver who had a girlfriend, told me he loved me more, and set the scene for a decade of me chasing emotionally unavailable men who didn’t love me back

7. After high school graduation, getting schooled on how to drink beer (and getting drunk for the first time) with Bad Influence, my high school buddy (His tip: Always drink a root beer first so your burps taste good)

8. Binge drinking root beer (and then some) for four years straight at college

9. At 22, falling in love and moving in with Trouble, a.k.a. a 37-year-old bodybuilder with a checkered past

10. At 23, barely escaping Trouble with my life

11. At 29, landing my dream job where I got to write about Barbie all day long

12. After a safe and predictable three-year relationship with Mr. Vanilla, loudly and proudly proclaiming while watching the movie The Tao of Steve, “I want to meet someone who’ll ROCK my world!”

13. Enter Mr. Rocky Road, a.k.a. the first man to make me feel seen, heard, loved, and adored (when we weren’t embroiled in a codependent nightmare, that is!)

14. Watching all my friends get married, have babies, and settle down, desperately wishing Mr. Rocky Road could get his act together and morph into The One

15. Breaking up, making up, & breaking down for six months straight during my Big Breakup with Mr. Rocky Road

16. Running off to Greece following my Big Breakup: Sunbathing topless for the first time, hiking a 17 km gorge with a gorgeous Air Force officer, and coming home alive, hell bent on proving to my dad I wasn’t foolish, crazy, or wrong for going alone

17. After 4 1/2 years, breaking up the Barbie, quitting my job, & not having a plan

18. Launching my first website BreakupChronicles.com one week after leaving my job

19. Renting out my condo, putting my stuff in storage, and escaping to the Montana wilderness for a month to “figure things out”

20. Scoring my first piece of press, a front-page feature in my hometown newspaper (Miss: Hiding all day when the paper hit stands, afraid to own it and celebrate it)

21. Coming back to LA, sleeping on a blowup mattress on my best friend’s living room floor, and feeling happy for the first time in a long time

22. Falling in love with myself, my life, and becoming a man magnet

23. Meeting my future husband at a bar, thinking he was 20-years-old and gay, bonding over a shared love of David Sedaris and Pink Martini

24. Recognizing on date #2 that my future husband could be The One (he’d just finished telling me, “I’m too nice for the naughty girls and too naughty for the nice ones.” Disco!

25. Telling my future husband on that same second date that I never wanted to get married or have babies

26. Getting my first book deal

27. Becoming a best-selling author (Miss: Coming home from my book tour and realizing I was a broke best-selling author)

28. Getting the call from my publicist that the Today Show wanted me on to talk about my first book IF: I came to New York the following week and shot B roll of one woman getting a post-breakup makeover and another woman having a Movin’ On party. The catch: I had to set it all up (Not having been in New York since college and not knowing anyone in the city, I said yes, and within a week had everything I needed for 2 kick ass segments!)

29. Realizing I really can do anything I set my mind to (Priceless, Mastercard!)

30. After years of being an excessive Sex and the City fan, spending one hour chatting with Candace Bushnell about the REAL Mr. Big

31. Handing my future husband my grandmother’s wedding ring and saying, “Give it back when you’re ready.” (Miss: Getting mad that it took him another six months to propose!)

32. Three years ago, donning a red gown, walking down the aisle to Etta James’ “At Last”, & promising to love my husband forever (The EASIEST thing I’ll ever do)

33. Spending a month in Paris on our honeymoon, watching Obama get elected, and celebrating hope around the world

34. Inspiring my sister to believe in love for the first time in 10 years and find HER Mr. Right

35. Writing 4 more books while building a profitable consulting business I LOVE

36. Loving (and eventually losing) my first pet, my cat Maya

37. Crying when I found out that my beautiful, smart, 18-year-old sister-in-law was pregnant

38. Being my 19-year-old sister-in-law’s birth coach, eventually helping her through a C-section after 19 frustrating hours of labor, and being the first family member to hold my niece

39. Leaving the hospital, realizing for the first time that my niece wasn’t coming home with ME

40. Having made peace with my childhood, being compassionate for my 20 something wild child, and appreciating the wisdom and experience of my 30s, looking forward to my 40s with a mix of curiosity, possibility, and excitement

What about you? What are some of YOUR hits and misses from YOUR life in progress?

So here I am – today – turning 40. It doesn’t feel right because I just don’t picture myself as 40. In my mind I see myself somewhere in my late 20′s or 30′s. Maybe it’s because I don’t know what 40 feels like yet.

Honestly my 30′s were a mix of good and bad. I got married and divorced in my 30′s. I bought and sold a house in my 30′s. I found out I can’t have kids in my 30′s and realized that I can never ever live without a dog in my life. I worked at 5 companies. I became an aunt – twice. I witnessed the passing of all 4 of my grandparents and several other loved ones. I experienced a lot, lived a lot and learned a lot.

These are the top things I have learned in the past 40 years:

1. I never knew the power of a dog in my life until I got one; now I cannot imagine a life without one – ever.

2. I have come to realize that following my passion might be fun but it isn’t going to pay the bills. I am a realist.

3. My family is the best thing that has ever happened to me I will go down fighting for them in any circumstance.

4. Italian food wins, hands down, every time

5. The grass is not always greener but sometimes you have to visit it, and roll around in it for awhile to realize it.

6. Money does not solve all problems, but it can makes the ones you have easier.

7. I rent my apartment and I love it. I love it much more than the house I owned for 2.5 years.

8. I would rather have you hold my heart than hold my hand. I can take care of myself if I need to but I prefer to do it while you are loving me.

9. I don’t have room for unnecessary drama in my life any longer. With age comes wisdom about just how unnecessary drama is nothing more than draining.

10. I am an open person. I wear my heart on my sleeve and I will share a lot with you. If you betray my trust I will never share with you again.

11. I am crier. I cry when I am sad, nostalgic, angry, frustrated, and even sometimes when I am happy. Just pass the tissues I will be fine.

12. I don’t judge you, but if you judge me I WILL judge you right back. Sorry I am just not that big of a person.

13. Sometimes I eat cereal for dinner and grilled cheese sandwiches for breakfast. I haven’t died yet.

14. Cotton over silk, denim over linen, and fleece over cashmere all the time (well ok not fleece over cashmere ALL the time)

15. A good pair of black boots, a sweet pair of jeans and a black sweater can work every time.

16. Bon Jovi forever.

17. A quiet night in can be just as thrilling as a wild night out.

18. Food should be eaten to enjoy not just to sustain.

19. Sometimes being right is not as important as admitting when you are wrong.

20. I will probably never keep a blog for more than one year before I change URLs – so follow me if you want.

21. I love watching football in the fall – yes, a girl who enjoys a Sunday of wings, football, and being lazy in front of the games.

22. Halloween is probably my least favorite holiday followed by St. Patrick’s Day.

23. Thanksgiving and Christmas are my favorites.

24. Kissing someone new and amazing in the rain is one of the best feelings ever.

25. I keep saying I want to go skydiving and I do; but I keep chickening out.

26. I am completely and utterly open to any possibilities that come my way in the coming year.

I was hoping to come up with 14 more to make an even 40 – keep coming back I’ll come up with them eventually.

more from Michelle at www.viewfrom40.com

In my younger years I was always searching searching searching. Although it wasn’t really clear to me what I was searching so hard for.

When I was 16 I met the definition of what I wanted
When I was 18 I stole my fathers car and ran away to California.
When I was 19 I came home from California
When I was 19 I made the biggest mistake of my life
When I was 20 I met the best thing that ever happened to me.

I’m acutely aware of how quickly it is all moving. I look at myself and I feel the same. I got some girth compared to my svelte 20 self but not to shabby. I have Geoff, an amazing Dude man, family, friends, job and life. And it scares the heck out of me. Now, I’m not searching. I found it. And its going way to fast. My life has gone to plaid!

It hasn’t come without its struggles and hardships. Although I like to think that my life has been gifted to me on a platinum platter, I’ve certainly put my best foot forward. I’ve always been determined to get what I want no matter how hard I have to work for it. And for the most part that has worked out for me. And this got me thinking about how I got to be who I am today. I don’t really know the answer to that but I have some theory’s.

When I was 9 I was attacked by our family dog. I had a ridiculous amount of stitches in my face and under my chin. A week later I begged my mother to take me into school so I could get my things and see my friends. I walked right into that class room like, see?? no big deal folks just a couple scratches but no big deal. NO BIG DEAL???? REALLY???? I never saw my scars. I never looked at my face and thought it was flawed. I got bit by a dog what do you expect? And do you know to this day some dummy will ask me: What is that on your chin?? A hickey? And my response has been the same all these years. No bleep I got bit by a dog! There do you feel stupid now? Good!

I baby stepped my way through my career. But I worked my fanny off proving myself along the way. No was never an option unless of course it was a “hard” NO! Nobody handed me anything or made it so easy that it was a no brainer. I’m good with that. I never got in trouble with out a consequence. Thus I learned to not get caught..[sorry mom and dad, some things must remain sacred]

I’ve been squashed, punched, kicked, verbally assaulted and I never gave up. I never give up. So now that I stopped “searching” I would also like it if time slowed down just a bit.

No wonder when you are elderly you can’t remember things! It goes by so fast you can’t believe that much time has gone by. And that bridge game you played with Phyllis didn’t that just happen last week?

I’ve set no ridiculous goals for this year. I think the most important thing to do is to be sure that I’m looking outside the bubble and enjoying as much as I can!

Don’t you????

more from Rene at http://www.thereneechronicles.com

So this starts like a sad story, but dont be fooled – this time I’m sitting in the hotel, working for myself for the 1st time ever, generating more money in 1 week than i ever did in a month! I have two amazing girls one 6 and one 8, a great wife, great barn conversion, etc, etc……but the drive has always come from making it prior to 40.

Well have i made it? Good question, and I think if my only drive was material things, then yes – but still the question get me thinking…is making it about only this.

I step into the next chapter, hopefully i will find what im looking for, or maybe i already have it, either way – lets looks forward to good wine, great family, as much fun as i can have……and who knows maybe by 50 i will have an answer.

At age 12, I was diagnosed with juvenile diabetes. “Blindness,” “kidney failure,” “amputation,” and “no children” were recurring words that accompanied the diagnosis. Determined to conquer this disease and lead a fulfilling life, I went on the insulin pump at age 17. Having diabetes has strengthened my faith, confidence, and sense of humor. If one can manage and laugh about the daily challenges and surprises of living with diabetes, then one can accomplish anything!

Shortly after turning 40, I was honored by the local chapter of the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation (JDRF). This life-changing experience directly partnered me with JDRF and the work that is being done to cure diabetes.
via: More Magazine

The Women at Forty Five Questions Challenge – 100 women, 5 questions, 3 words or less

We want 100 women to answer 5 questions in 3 words or less. As a woman whose nickname was the village lawyer as a child, I know how hard it is to answer any question in 3 words or less, but that’s why this is a challenge. As for getting 100 women to respond…if Three 6 Mafia can win an Oscar…

So, here are the ground rules:

* Leave your responses in the comment section of this post

* Copy and past the question block, and type your answers next to the questions

* Include your name (screen name if you prefer to remain anonymous) and your age

* Answer each question in three words or less

* Any woman who’s turning forty soon (you decide what soon is) or been there-done that (no matter how long ago), can participate

And here are your five questions:

1. Most exciting thing you did/plan to do at forty?

2. Biggest regret?

3. The thing(s) you’re most proud of?

4. The monkey on your back you can’t shake?

5. Finish this sentence (ok, so technically it’s not a question) – If Three 6 Mafia can win an Oscar, I can…

Forward the challenge to your friends and keep up with everyone’s answers by clicking on the comment section of this post. You can also keep up with responses by clicking the five questions tag in the tag cloud located in the video box on the right side of our home page. To start us off, check out my answers here.

Become a fan of the Women at Forty page on Facebook, and follow us on Twitter @womenatforty.

via Women at Forty.

A man walked on the moon in the summer of 1969.

Before I turned 40 I contemplated a lot about my life~where I was at with my carrer, where I was at with my 20 year marriage, where I was at with my life. What I came up with is that 40 is just a number. I am happy with everything in my life~just as I was when I was 39! In the end, it is how you look at turning 40.

To everyone that is turing 40, or is already 40 it is just a number. If you are unhappy at 39, well then you are sure going to be unhappy at 40 and vice versa! Good luck to everyone!

The next step was reflection.. remembering the years gone by, the adventures, the challenges and the ups and downs on the roller coaster ride of life.  Taking a little mental check to see if I was satisfied with what my life amounted to til now…a great gift to myself.

It was a really enjoyable process, meandering through the endless field of memories cultivated from 40 years on our glorious planet.  Many many forgotten faces, experiences, and feelings came back into the here and now…Very pleaseant.

A great trip down memory lane… and a wonderful way to begin creating a little blueprint for the next 40 years of fun. Seeing what still inspires you, what you  would still like to do/achieve/try/create & experience

In a few days I am 41. I am feeling great. I bought a bicycle and am loving the expereince of scooting  about the city. Its healthy and amazing  fun discovering places you didnt know exist just a few mintues from your neighbourhood.

Ladies and gents .. get on your bikes.. it is a fabuous way to nuture vitality and wellbeing.

Until next time

mysticmiss

I suppose that is sorta how I feel about turning 40. I don’t feel forty. A good point is that no I do not listen to Van Halen much but my Ipod is instead loaded with Sublime, The White Stripes, Shiny Toy Guns, Wilco, TV on the Radio and the like. I suppose I believed when I was a kid that forty year olds just listened to Paul Anka and were busy yelling at the neighbor kids to get out of their yard.

I suppose it is a blessing to feel more at ease talking to those younger then me then those older, but it is a bigger blessing that I feel I have more in common with the youth. Some of this youthful outlook is great. I love working out. Most folks my age seem to be less fit and as time goes on just give up being healthy. What started as weight loss morphed into weight training and now is taking on new avenues of fitness. I Loved bicycling into work the last few days and flipping off the gas sign on the way. I plan to do this until late fall (gas sign flipage contingent on future gas prices), but who knows we may have a mild winter. The point is that I am in the best physical shape of my life and I plan to improve to a higher excellence as time goes on and that is not the thinking of an old man.

The down side was I could of accomplished much more if I was not so immature in other areas of my life. My youth was not filled with sex, drugs, and rock and roll but two out of three ain’t bad. I would of took them all but their is no accounting for taste in the fairer sex. It is sorta silly to look back with regret. I mean the first time I benched four sets of 10 I did the bar alone. The next week I improved. We all start somewhere and when we start is different for all of us. Why did I wait until 38 to get healthy? The only thing I can come up with was I was resting from what I thought was an overwhelming life. Now I workout to get more from life.

All and all it is a beautiful life. Their is plenty of things to work on but I suppose I feel rested and ready for the challenge. I keep my eyes open for the wonder and never say never. It is like Dylan sang, “Ah, but I was so much older then I’m younger then that now.

Read more from Augiegus

Officially, as I am writing this, I have six more days until I turn 40. There’s been no panic yet, no wringing of the hands and no crying or gnashing of teeth.

Just calmness. Really.

A lot of people would circle May 1 on their calendars with a big black marker if they were in my shoes. Most people I know that are turning 40 rank this particular birthday right up there with their joy of flossing. Me, I’m fine with it. Really.

Turning 40 does give you a chance to reflect on things. My 20s were great … wait, change that adjective to delicious. My 30s forced me to deal with a few more “grown up” things and, to tell the truth, I’m kind of looking forward to my 40s.

There are a couple of things, though, that do make me wonder a little bit. When you think about people that have been incredibly successful by the time they are 40, or shortly therafter, it makes you take a little stock in your life.

You think about young 40-somethings like J.K. Rowling – of Harry Potter, Inc. – and how Rowling has changed children’s literature forever. Or Johnny Depp, who was named People magazine’s “sexiest man alive” at age 40.

That kind of success is hard to live up to. I mean, I occasionally collect aluminum cans and I always treat well at Halloween, but I’m no Johnny Depp. Really.

But I do feel young. I have a job that forces me to want to stay young. I am around young people almost every day and I will show no weakness. There might be an occasional “Goo!” when I have to get off the bench in the dugout, or a knee might lock up on a trip up some rickety bleachers, but I plan on being there every day keeping it real. Really.

And I think that’s why I’m not that worried about 40. Okay, I’m worried that someone might put an ad in the paper that says “Lordy, Lordy Look Who’s 40”, but that’s just because it is the most annoying phrase ever uttered.

And, oh yeah, there’s those prostrate exams I am supposed to be scheduling on a yearly basis now, too, but, for the most part, things are cool.

Now a few facts about my birthday:

• I share the same special day with Tim McGraw (country) and Calamity Jane (western), yet I hate country and western music. Go figure.

• I share the same birthday with Ray Parker Jr. I have no explanation for that, but it is kind of cool.

• The Empire State Building was completed on May 1, 1931. We are a lot alike, me and the ESB, we both have a lot of stories.

• And, my birthday is a Russian holiday aimed at getting worker’s a shorter work day. Perfect.

My gut feeling is that this coming Thursday will come and go pretty quietly, which is more than I can say for this past year, which had some major developments.

I left a job I had held for over 15 years to come back to my hometown and work which was the first major development of Year 39. I also met a ton of new people, including some awesome co-workers, who make my job a joy every day. Lastly, I got some new wheels.

So if I can make Year 40 as great as Year 39 I will have no worries at all. Really.

I feel the same as I did when I was 18. Maybe not quite the same shape but mentally I do. Lately I’ve found myself reminiscing of my teens & early 20’s, listening to music from that time, looking at old photos and talking to my friends about the things we did. Some days are good others are bad. Some days it just seems to consume my every thought & feeling. I lie awake at night thinking of the past, remembering things probably more as I want to remember them, through rosy coloured glasses.

I try to remind myself of all the great things that I’ve seen & done. I’m married to an absolutely beautiful and wonderful person who is my best friend, have a great marriage, a beautiful daughter & another one due soon. I live in a beautiful part of the world, own a great house, and have seen so much of the world.

I know I’ve been fortunate, and don’t deny that, but I just can’t help focusing on turning 40. Both of my parents died relatively young and that may be a major contributor to the feeling that there are less days ahead now than there are behind me. I miss them terribly.

Maybe it’s the reality that my time has past & it’s now my children’s time to discover the world, to have their own adventures and experiences. It’s their world now. Maybe 40 makes you take stock of things and reflect on your life. Thinking of all the things I wanted to be and the man I became.

Michele Sundstrom

Deep breathe in..I will be 40 on Sunday…Slowly breathe out… There I’ve said it.
Ive not quite got my head round the thought of being 40. That is definately a grown up age. Am I grown up? Do I behave like a responsible mature adult? Should I by now be buying The Daily Mail (This will never happen, while I am still able to form a thought! (unless they give away a good free DVD)), worrying about the price of property, harking back to a golden era (The 80s!!!), bemoaning how easy it is for the “Youth of Today”,and saying things like “why can’t they write a proper tune! like those nice New Romantics”, “What sort of name is 50 Cents”,and “Wot is it wit all this txt speak! lol”? The stark reality is that I am now as closer to my parent’s generation, than to that of someone leaving University.
In a desperate bid to still feel vaguely attached to a youthful age I am currently scouring application forms and surveys where I can tick a box labled Age : 20 – 39. I can do this for 3 days only!
I never thought my actual chronological age would bother me, but clearly it does. It is surely no coincidence that I started blogging 2 weeks before my 40th. There is a danger that instead of becomming more responsible post 40, I will have contra reaction and start to behave more erratically. I may even consider a tattoo, although it may well just say “Best before Feb 2007″
All joking aside, turning 40 has made me reflect. My main regret is that I took so long to get to grips with who I really am, and I will never get that time back. I must endeavour to make sure the 2nd half of my life, living as I always wanted to be, are the most fulfilled and cherished years of my life.
Posted by Jenny Harvey (Still in her 30s)

When I was in the second grade, I was certain I would never see forty. Hey, I was only 7 and the year 2000 sounded impossible. Being forty sounded extremely old to me. I think it does for all seven year olds.

I remember Sister Mary Margaret, my teacher, talking about how lucky we would be. To be turning forty, in the year 2000. It is going to be magical, she said. Magical? Was she kidding? I would have to be working, or have three or four kids by then. I would be too old to enjoy any of the “Magic”.

As I got a bit older, still in the same grammar school, I over heard a teacher saying she was forty. I hadn’t thought of her as old until then. I figured she had to be the oldest teacher in the school.

When I graduated eighth grade, all I could think of was turning fifteen. I did just a week after graduation. I dreamed of all of the fun and how grown up I was going to be in my teens.

That summer I went through a sort of metamorphosis. I made friends with a Public School girl, and came out of my sheltered life. I also got a lot more responsibility at that time. My mother had to go to work, and I had to really help with keeping up the house, cooking dinner and so much more.

There I was fifteen years old just coming into my own. I was also becoming an adult much earlier that I had planned. I don’t know how I did it. I was juggling new friendships, new responsibilities, and all of the things young teens go through. OK, My teens weren’t as carefree as I had planned. Yet I still told myself I was just a kid. For some reason, that made me feel better. I mean, hey, kids have it easy, right?

I made it through my teens, trudging along all the way. Oh, I had plenty of good times. Don’t feel sorry for me. I sure didn’t.

I remember the day I turned twenty-one, vividly. I hid in my bedroom nearly all day. Whether I liked it or not, I was fully, and legally an adult. I could no longer relax behind the vial of childhood. I was an adult, and like it or not, I had to act like one.

Actually I had been acting as an adult from fifteen, but now everyone expected of me. It was a given. Yet still, in the back of my mind I would never see forty. I don’t know why, at that point in my life, I still felt that way, but I did.

All through my thirties, I would cringe when anyone talked about the year 2000. Not because I thought the world would come to an end, but that I would. After thirty-five, it seemed like it was all anyone talked about. I couldn’t stand it. Didn’t they know I wasn’t going to see forty? Didn’t they care?

At thirty-nine my thinking started to change. It was starting to look like I just might make it to forty. I started, slowly at first, getting excited about forty. By October, I started my celebration plans. Now huge party that I know of any way. Just me, out on the acre, with a bottle of Jack Daniels enjoying the day. I will celebrate my turning forty, and life it’s self that had brought me this far. That far and beyond.

It has taken me thirty-nine years, but I no longer fear any oncoming age. I will embrace each one and give thanks for letting me get there.

Thanks, for allowing me to ramble a bit. I think we all need to do that once in a while.

Yep, that’s right, yesterday I turned 40. Woo hoo! I took the day off, spent it with my precious family and ate a lot. It was good to be the birthday king.

My lovely wife and I were talking about history yesterday; the historical account of my turning 30. I had forgotten how traumatic it was for me. I did not take it well. But interestingly, entering a new decade yesterday was a great day. No fuss, no stress, no hand wringing and no trauma. I stumbled upon a “turning 40” blog today and I got to tell you, either those folks are not doing well or I’m the most well adjusted human on earth.

I would imagine it has something to do with my love for God having grown, my love for my wife having grown and my love for my children having grown. I don’t get warm fuzzies very often (my wife can verify), but that last sentence brings them.

At 40 I realize, maybe more than ever, what’s truly important.

Have an awesome day today!

Wayne

The Big “Four-O” — A Time For Reflection

Unlike many, turning 40 was not a heartbreaking experience for me.

Instead, I saw it as a much-needed time for reflection and introspection. For sitting back and analyzing what I had accomplished up to that point and trying to determine what should go next on my “to do” list of life. In the process, I came to the somewhat unsettling realization that my ideas of success, as well as my priorities, had changed significantly over the last few years.

While growing up, my parents constantly impressed upon me that family came first. As an adult, that core value remains dear to me today. However, it’s interesting to see how that value plays out differently today than 18 years ago.

Now, the small worries of preschoolers catching a cold have turned into the deeper concerns of teenagers getting into the right colleges, staying away from drugs, finding good friends and making the right choices. Increasingly, these concerns have become a major focal point of my life. At the same time, while my parents remained the backbone of my upbringing, it became apparent that our roles were slowly changing as well. Their health was gradually declining, and my time had come to start looking after them.
I feel very fortunate to have grown up with very young parents and two sets of grandparents. I also loved the fact that my children knew both their grandparents and their great grandparents. My kids learned so much from them, and I take special pride in knowing they had that opportunity. It was sad for all of us watching my grandparents get older and more fragile. But it was wonderful to see my children take care of them and return the love that had been given to them through the years.

I also took some time to look back and analyze my friendships. I felt blessed to have many of the same friends remain close for more than 20 years. In fact, my best friend from high school, Julia, whom I’ve known since our early teens, is still my very best friend. Our friendship has grown and evolved for 28 years.

True Friendship Stands the Test of Time

So what’s the point of this blog?

It’s not about what I achieved in my life on a professional level, or how much money I made or lost. Rather, it’s to dig into the relationships I have with my friends and see how they made my life so meaningful and rewarding. Too often, when looking back, we judge ourselves by the “trappings” of our lives — the jobs, bank accounts, material possessions and all the things we put so much time and energy into acquiring. Yet in the end, I’ll take a good friend over any of those, any time.

To me, the most important aspect of friendship is the support, cheerleading and nourishment that such a relationship offers over the years. As we grow older, we all change. However, in true friendship, we change and grow together. And that’s why it’s so important to have good friends close to you during the tough times as well as the joyful ones.

In many ways, friendship is like marriage because you have to work on it every day. It’s not easy to meet someone at a young age and maintain a close relationship. For friendship to thrive, you have to be considerate of each other’s feelings and respect each other’s values and beliefs. But you also have to be sensitive to the little things, such as a friend’s financial status when going out for a night on the town.

My father always said that you could judge a person by how many true friends he or she has. Maybe that’s why friendship has meant so much to me all my life. Being Fabulously Forty, I would like to pass this on to my children and encourage you to pass it on to yours:

Acquaintances may come and go, but family and friends are the true anchors of life. Never lose sight of the fact that they are precious, no matter what the circumstances.

Yana Berlin is the founder and CEO of Fabulously40, devoted to the celebration of all things: especially women, and the challenges and joys they face juggling their careers, children, relationships, and life’s other issues. Fabulously 40.com is a social network for women that catalyzes its members to celebrate and embrace their life. Since launching, Fabulously40, Mrs. Berlin has been connecting, and supporting women all over the world.

Over the past week, there has been terrible news. An acquaintance has been killed, a baseball player died, friends and family both received very concerning health news. Everything I need to put my life in perspective is here. I have been given great gifts. I just wish I felt better about how I was using them.

My misgivings about turning 40 have been considerable, but not rising from a general discomfort with growing old – though, I have to say, that number 40 seems as huge today as 30 once did (knowing full well that in 10 years time, both will seem impossibly young). It’s been this feeling that I’ve been moving backward as much as I’ve been moving forward.

That is really a stupid thought, given all that has happened in the past decade. Ten years ago, I was single and barely employed. Today, I am 7 1/2 years into marriage, with two children and – Breaking News – a third one on the way, a second little boy, coming right around the time the Dodgers will make their Coliseum appearance in March. (Talk about your Moon Shots!)

My career, after a pretty major detour, has also been on an upswing since last year – and that’s a relief. And Dodger Thoughts has been an unexpectedly rewarding pleasure.

But during the past 10 years, I abandoned the career that I really wanted, and to this day I regret the decision. A few somewhat out-of-touch acquaintances of mine this month have asked me if I were on strike (with the Writers Guild of America), and I found myself feeling sad to say that I wasn’t.

I wish I were screenwriting. In fact, I have an idea burning a hole in the pocket of my brain right now, but I have no time to work on it. Screenwriting, for me, is not like blogging. In the time that it takes me to get out what would qualify as a medium-to-long post on Dodger Thoughts, I’d just be getting warmed up to work on a script. That first hour of screenwriting was more like calisthenics than anything else. My life, these days, simply isn’t conducive to writing fiction.

But it’s not just the notion of a dream deferred or denied that has had me down. It’s that with the passing of that dream has come the passing of any chance of being worry-free when it comes to income. The fact is, short of actually being a working Hollywood writer, my job at Variety is about as happy a situation as I could have found. But it’s journalist pay. Nothing much there.

I can’t think of much that is more distasteful than complaining about money, and the fact is, I make more than plenty of people. So my point isn’t to cry poverty. It’s just to articulate this reality that my income isn’t keeping up with how much I’m spending on day-to-day life, even though I’m trying to keep those expenses to a minimum. This year, in fact, I will have made more money than I ever had before, and yet I’m still not earning what I need to. I’ve gone from fiscally responsible to irresponsible, with each passing year getting harder, regardless of what I should be earning or spending. That’s why I feel like I’m moving backward. I spend a great deal of time worrying. I find myself talking about it with other people even though it’s the last thing I want to talk about, because it’s so inexorably a part of what’s going on with me in my head. Money matters more to me than I could have ever dreamed possible 10 years ago – it’s poisoning my life. But moving to a cabin in Montana isn’t an option.

Ten years ago, I had sincere fears of hitting 40 lonely, not in financial decline. If it’s not one thing, it’s another. I don’t feel sorry for myself. I feel fortunate. I love this family of mine. But I’m just sharing with you that, in all honesty, when I see those bills, I have to remind myself to feel good about myself. It’s embarrassing, really.

Another place where I’m suffering is with my friends. In the past month, by coincidence, my best friend from college and my best friend from high school came into town for the first time since my wedding, and I had the chance to catch up with them for a couple hours apiece. Each time, with no effort, we fell into that incredible groove of conversation that best friends have. And then they were gone, eventually heading back to Michigan and Colorado. I still have my best best friend sleeping in the same bed with me, and my parents 10 minutes away (and don’t think I underestimate that). But aside from them, I just don’t really have anybody that tight. All my closest friends live elsewhere, and we’re horrible at keeping in touch. It’s just not right.

Perhaps most importantly – and this should be clear by the melancholy tone of this piece – I’m not entirely happy with the person I am, about how I can be angry and selfish and self-defeating. It’s not that I don’t have my good qualities, but I don’t really feel like I’m evolving. I’m meeting some of the greater challenges of my life, but I’m not keeping pace. As my world becomes centered around getting my work done, and making sure I give my kids what they need instead of screwing them up, and trying to juggle my pregnant wife’s prayer to get 15 more minutes of sleep in against my desire to have 15 minutes to myself, I feel more like I’m devolving, unless the fact that my life belongs more to others is the real evolution. I often tell people that now, the days take longer but the years fly by. It’s the strangest thing.

If I could give myself completely to my family, or take myself completely away, I’d be happy. But I find myself want to straddle the two, which are contradictory. Me Time vs. Them Time. Why can’t Them Time be Me Time 100 percent instead of less?

People can minimize it all they want, but these round-numbered birthdays are times that I take stock, and looking at myself, I see a complicated picture. I see things to celebrate, even to take pride in. But I don’t always take pride in myself. Just trying to survive each day and punch out a few good moments without screwing up doesn’t seem like much to crow about.

I’d like to say I love my life, but love implies accepting the good and the bad, let alone the simply irritating, and I struggle. My family can be a trial at times, but it gives me a kind of joy you simply can’t otherwise imagine, and I can honestly say that my favorite moment of any day are the moments that I walk my little girl to kindergarten, or hugging the kids good night. But I keep wanting perfection. I’m 40 years old and still a spoiled brat.

Anyway, when I went to bed Sunday, I turned out the light, looked at my clock glowing with its LCD display, prepared to tick off the last 45 minutes of my 30s, and said to myself, “Screw it. I’m just going to be a young 40.” It’s going to take some effort, but it’s pretty much the only way to go.

As I sit here reflecting on my life I realize that this indeed HAS been a journey.. One that continues on each & every day. There are so many things left for me to do, so many dreams for me to try & fulfill. I have always held that life should be what you make of it. Shit happens, but that doesn’t mean it should get you down. For me then…., I will make turning 40 not so much of a milestone in my life, but simply a marker saying “stillllll going”. I think that I will continue to define my life not by where I have been, but for where I have yet to go.

Amelia Earhart was just 22 days from her 40th birthday when her airplane disappeared while crossing the Pacific Ocean. She remarked before taking off on the world-spanning stunt, “I have a feeling that there is just about one more good flight left in my system, and I hope this trip is it.”

Her comments reflect the crossroads of the age. Turning 40 can be inspiring as well as deflating. Most people in the 19th century didn’t even reach that milestone birthday. But as medicine and sanitation improved, life expectancies dramatically rose. So did expectations and hopes. New crises emerged.

“This is the first time in history that people in their 40s, 50s and 60s are caught with their parents becoming dependent on them while they still have children in high school and college,” said Dr. Barbara Ensor, a psychologist specializing in aging issues at Mercy Medical Center in Baltimore, Md. “People in the middle of this ‘Sandwich Generation’ are pretty stressed out. They might have thought that this would be the time in their lives to take vacations and cruises. But that’s turning out to not be the case. That can be depressing.”

Add these new complications to classic mid-life-crisis feelings, and being 39 today ends up being more complex and emotional than ever.

Ensor said, “In a positive fashion, it’s a time to stop and look and evaluate where you’ve been and where you are going. Do you need to make major changes? Do you need to tweak anything? Maybe it’s time to go off on another career. … If you are given to a more negative interpretation, this is the beginning of the end.”

I have nothing to feel unhappy with turning 40 – I have a great life, but there is something about it that is affecting me.  I am thinking back to events that were 10, 20 even 25 and 30 years ago that I remember and amazing myself dealing with blocks of time that are not insignificant and that I have personally lived.

 A friend of mine who is 43 now trying to cheer me up mentioned that 40 was the new 30, and I do feel this had a thread of truth to it so I am not going to spend my time being morose – I suppose I am more intrigued by a state of mind washing over a normally very clear-thinking individual which is purely the arrival at this milestone.  Another mitigating factor is that I have certainly done some hair-brain things in my time and it’s actually quite an achievement in the light of some of those escapades to have achieved it at all.

Anyway I shall continue to contemplate on my new status.  My life is brilliant, my age just begins with a 4! Alastair