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Turning 40 Rss

As Long As I Have Breath, I Have Strength by Alyndra

Posted on : 26-09-2009 | In : Gratitude |269 views

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I turn 40 this yr (this tues), and not really going thru any kinda of mid life crisis, but definitely glad the last 1 of my 4 kids is graduating this yr from high school! But because I started a family at 18, I feel like now I have to make up for lost time. Not necessarily the partying aspect but in education and self-fulfillment. I’ve had to be Mom and Dad thru the entire ride and with that comes all the sacrifice you can give, and then some, with reservations for more. I didn’t get to do anything for myself for trying to keep my family intact w/ school and finances, home maintenance, child rearing, and partially responsible for a granny.

So now that the kids are grown with their own family and careers, the baby is 18 (mid Oct), Mom has since passed on, as well as my uncle (granny’s only 2 children). Granny is getting more honory by the day, and I’m trying to put my life is some sort of order so I don’t look up to find regret staring me in the face in 10 yrs. Now I got another set of problems: downgrade in living quarters (don’t need a 3-4 bdrm house with extra bills), find some sort of scholarship/grant to go back to school (jacked up my chances at financial aid trying to go to school when my kids were young, now they wont give me anything), and learn how to cater to myself.

As long as I have breath, I have strength. Wish me luck!

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