A Poem On Turning 40 by Michelle

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On Turning 40

Michele Sundstrom

Posted in Gratitude, Looking Back | No Comments »

“Turning Forty”… by SlackerDan

I was born February 21st, 1968, and tomorrow I will become forty years of age.

I don’t know if I feel forty. Half of my soul inside seems still youthful, yet the other half feels ancient from what I’ve witnessed so far in my life. People like me who have been born in the late 60’s and early 70’s have seen so much change in just four decades: computers becoming household items, the fall of the U.S.S.R., and the horror of 9-11 just to name a few incredible and sometimes terrifying world events. We were children in the 70’s and 80’s, assured of a bright future, making wishes on what we wanted to be when we grew up. And then we did grow up, and for many of us our childhood dreams did not come true. We had to settle for working random and temporary jobs compared to our forebears, mostly just to survive in this society whose God is money, not compassion.

I see the world today in my last few hours of being thirty-nine years old and I am worried. Am I going into my forties just to witness yet more government control, our freedoms stripped away in order to “protect us”? Yesterday while I was on the bus I noticed three ceiling cameras monitoring the passengers. It may not seem to be an omen to some, but I have to ask: how invasive will such “security” cameras become to our privacy? Has humanity made true and healthy progress, or are we backsliding into a controlled society worse than the Nazi regime?

We live in a civilization that should be based on compassion but is most assuredly not, and we are run by power-hungry psychopaths. This is not a world into which I feel comfortable growing older; already I feel nostalgia for a past that is gone and great uneasiness towards a future that may not be kind to those of our generation, or anyone of any age.

I have regrets, mistakes I have made and people I have made unhappy. I miss my estranged son each and every day, and I have deep regret in my soul that I haven’t been a father to him. I wish his mother and I could have stayed together, been happy together, but we were just too different and were not good for one another. And I worry very, very much for my son when I see the world today; will his generation inherit a collapsed economy, harsh government control, and even possibly riots for the necessities of life?

Yet there is much in the future to hope for: more and more people are waking up to this grim reality around them and are now working for real change. Many of us of the “Generation X” era are much wiser now, having grown up in a world that often makes us pay heavily for mistakes; but many of us have not learned much at all, being distracted by popular media and choosing entertainment over education. I hope with great sincerity we can use what we have learned to help each other, not just to benefit ourselves individually.

Like many in my generation, I have seen many of my older relatives pass away and I have suffered the loss of a parent. So many of my uncles and aunts are gone now to that bastard Reaper, as well as my father; I remember as a child the family get-togethers every year for Christmas, Easter, New Year’s… but those family gatherings are gone now too, since so much of my family has aged and died.

How many years do we have left now, us in our late thirties and early forties? We are feeling the energy and vigor of our youth fading away each day, no longer do we take our health for granted like many of us did as teen-agers. In two more decades or so we’ll become geriatrics, how’s that for a thought?

We still have time but no longer can we afford to waste it. Every day we grow older, the more we must appreciate the wonder and miracle of Life. Every one of us is a unique creation given the opportunity each and every day to bring love or hate into this world. Just think: in an infinite Universe in a sea of infinite probability we were born; now we’re growing older, no longer do we have the seeming immortality of youth. Time now to us in our generation is a gift to be cherished, not wasted.

So happy birthday to me, I guess. Tomorrow I’ll be forty, I still can’t believe it. But I do believe in and thank whatever Divine Spirit is out there for the family and friendships I have, and for the shelter over my head and the food in my belly. I wish Life would never end, but I know one day it will, so I’ll try my best to make each passing moment a little bit of forever.

SlackerDan is a writer specializing in web content and comedy. He owns the coolest URL on the ‘Net, www.internetslacker.com. If you are a webmaster and/or editor searching for excellent material, please contact him at internet.slacker@gmail.com .

Posted in Gratitude | 1 Comment »

Not Looking Forward to Turning 40 by Angela

I am turning that awful number in just one week. I don’t know if I can take it. I blacked it out on the calendar - I just want to skip over that day-pretend that it doesnt exist. I dont want presents, party or anything to that matter reminding me of that dreadful day. Alot of bad things will happen in my 40’s and in the year that I supposedly will turn 40. First - that is when you get your boobs squished, my 16 year old son will probably get his license and I will have to hope for the best. My youngest will be starting high school this year also. All of that happens right after I turn 40. In my 40’s decade - my youngest will get her license, both children will graduate high school and college. They could also get married and have their own children while in my 40’s. So what is there to look forward to by turning 40? Nothing- I cant think of anything good.

Posted in Fear | 3 Comments »

Why All The Hype About Turning 40?

When I was 30 I dreaded the thought of turning 40 - it was going to be terrible…I just knew it. Well 40 is here and quite frankly…it was no big deal.  In fact my life is better than ever - I’ve recently had my first baby and I feel and look great…other than some of that baby fat that is hard to get rid of around the midsection. I’m secretly afraid that someone will ask me someday if I’m her grandma but thankfully people always just ask me if she’s my “first.”

I keep reading all the time in beauty mags and even on the bulletin boards that 40 is some type of major threshold - you shouldn’t wear sparkly or shiny makeup, you should cut your hair, not wear short skirts or shorts and on and on. I love to sparkle, I love my long hair and I would wear shorts every day if I could.

So is 40 really a big deal? I don’t think so. What about you?

Do you feel and/or look 40? I sure don’t feel it! How about you?

 http://community.qvc.com/topic/Beauty-Banter/Hype-Age-40/10100000987

Posted in Aging | 1 Comment »

It’s All Cake by Deborah

I took most of this past year to wrap my head around the fact that I was about to enter my fifth decade on the planet. Turning 40 is quite an occasion for review, especially given the fact that I pretty much got off the tradition track at age 30. Instead of children I went down the other fork in the road–creative work and spiritual practice having been my main forms through which to learn many of life’s lessons –and the number of this birthday brought that truth up like never before. After a fun evening with the colleagues and pals at the de young (which included attendance of Jello Biafra’s reading about much of his wild ride of a life) today I can say, with complete sincerity, how grateful I am for the wild chances, blatant mistakes, serendipitous moves, and sober choices I’ve made as well as the people, opportunities, grief, love and beauty I’ve experienced because of them. And most of all, the many people I’ve had the priviledge of sharing the learning with. Love and appreciation everyone and here’s to more love, peace, wisdom and joy to us all. Aging really is a good thing.
And wishing happy birthday to my twin brother Scott Crooks at the same time. Go bro!

http://deborahcrooks.blogspot.com/2008/02/its-all-cake.html

Posted in Gratitude | No Comments »

Over the hill and up a creek

BY MEREDITH C. CARROLL

Being middle-aged has taken quite a beating as of late. The Food and Drug Administration issued a warning last week that Botox injections — the saving grace for those with rapidly maturing foreheads — can result in serious adverse reactions, including death.

Forty-seven-year-old Columbia University and Harvard Law School graduate Barack Obama has been dogged in recent weeks by critics who say the junior senator from Illinois is too young and inexperienced to be a replacement for the guy who cites Colgate toothpaste as the thing he has in common with the former Prime Minster of the United Kingdom. And now comes word indicting the fifth decade of life as the worst.

According to a recent study, people are more likely to be “truly miserable” in their 40s than at any other time. Researchers say one possible reason is that it could be the period in life when people realize their dreams will likely go unfulfilled. Another theory is that people start to die more frequently after hitting the big 4-0, which in turn is a reminder to survivors of their own mortality and impending death.

In further depressing news for forty-somethings, it appears as if the downward middle age spiral doesn’t discriminate. It hits those married and single, wealthy and destitute, as well as those with or without children. It remains to be seen whether the information in the study is so depressing that it will negatively affect people in their 30s who are now inevitably becoming painfully aware of what’s in store for them.

On a more uplifting note, the study found that those who make it to the age of 70 in good physical condition will enjoy the same mental health and happiness as a 20-year-old — just as long as it’s a 20-year-old who hasn’t heard what could very well happen once 40 hits. (Cue golf claps.)

Of course there are plenty of people who never experience a blue period in their 40s.

At least not solely by virtue of being middle-aged. Another recently released study suggests the future is “bleak” for people whose spouses get on their nerves. The research found that the longer a couple stays together, the more they irk each other.

Nitpicking that at one time is found to be only mildly annoying can develop into a majorly thorny issue as the years of marital bliss progress.

And it turns out that as the husband/wife relationship deteriorates, it makes other relationships seem rosy by comparison. The study says that’s because people can weed out friends, ditching those who never cease causing aggravation.

Unfortunately, though, it’s never quite as easy to scrap a spouse.

But, according to a different study, holding on to a hated life partner could be good for longevity. Preliminary findings from a study out of the University of Michigan show that couples that fail to express their anger toward one another die way before than those who regularly duke it out. Not to mention couples that suppress their ire increase their likelihood of developing high blood pressure and heart disease.

In other words, people who survive the misery of their 40s and make it to 70 in okay shape — just in time to enjoy the same mental benefits of a 20-year-old — still enjoy good life expectancy rates as long as they share the rest of their lives with partners who make their skin crawl.

To be sure, there are plenty of advantages to being middle-aged that none of the studies mention. Car insurance rates are usually lower for drivers with long, clean records (although, of course, life insurance rates jump significantly after the age of 40). Forty-somethings usually stop getting seated at the kids’ table at family events, and move to the family table from the singles’ table at weddings and bar mitzvahs.

Also, forty-somethings are just a handful of years away from those coveted AARP memberships.

And turning 40 means it’ll only ever be another five years or so until 61-year-old Cher looks like she’s 40, too. Unless the FDA decides to ban Botox outright anytime soon, in which case Cher should age well past her 40s within a few months.

Aspen resident Meredith C. Carroll writes a Friday column in the Summit Daily News. E-mail questions or comments to meredithccarroll@hotmail.com.  Get Columnists Feeds

Posted in Humor | No Comments »

Turning 40 – just get over it

 by Terri

My big four-oh has come and gone. And to tell you the truth, I was so busy and had such a great party, I haven’t really given the milestone itself much thought. This ‘coming of age’ certainly hasn’t depressed me. In fact I think I found turning 30 much more difficult.

At 30 there was a long mental list of things yet to be achieved. Get married, have a child, improve career, get fit, get finances in order. Now I’m not sure whether I’ve achieved all these things or whether it’s simply that I care less about achieving them.
I have certainly gotten married and had a child. Two big ticks there. Whether or not I’ve improved the career is questionable. It’s waxed and waned courtesy of the second tick. Career is certainly less important to me than it was a decade ago.

I did get fit. In fact following my 30th birthday I launched into a swimming career with gusto that culminated in me competing internationally at age 34. But like the career, the fitness levels have also waxed and waned courtesy again of that second tick.
I haven’t really got my finances in order but I certainly seem to have more financial freedom. During my twenties my pay was spent before I earned it. Now I think at least my debts are under control and I can afford to eat dinner!

So a few things have changed, but mostly they haven’t. Many of my similarly aged friends have remarked to me that while physically they feel a little different (!!), mentally they are just the same as they have always been. To think that when I looked once looked at 40 year olds and saw an old person, I was just looking at a 20 year old with drooping arms!

I used to think that turning 30 was the end of childhood but now that I am 40 I know that childhood never ends. We just get taller and flabbier and are forced to act more responsibly sometimes. But underneath it all we’re just as silly as we always were. (And if you don’t believe that you should have been at my party at 4.30am the morning after.)

One of the many lovely friends who came to wish me happy birthday (and one in the post-40 category), wrote, “It just gets better!” on my card. And I must say I believe her.

Ironically there is a confidence that only getting older gives you. Along with the back and neck aches, the veins on the legs, the grey hairs and the loss of a waist, there’s definitely more of a “take me as I am” feeling. Which is just as well, because there is only so much you can do about the effects of ageing.

The most comforting thing is that you are not alone. I have friends I’ve known since we were four and guess what … they’re now 40 too! And they really are pretty much the same. So I would say to anyone worrying about turning 40, get over it. It only gets better!

Posted in Getting Better with Time | No Comments »

Turning 40 by Jenny

Deep breathe in..I will be 40 on Sunday…Slowly breathe out… There I’ve said it.
Ive not quite got my head round the thought of being 40. That is definately a grown up age. Am I grown up? Do I behave like a responsible mature adult? Should I by now be buying The Daily Mail (This will never happen, while I am still able to form a thought! (unless they give away a good free DVD)), worrying about the price of property, harking back to a golden era (The 80s!!!), bemoaning how easy it is for the “Youth of Today”,and saying things like “why can’t they write a proper tune! like those nice New Romantics”, “What sort of name is 50 Cents”,and “Wot is it wit all this txt speak! lol”? The stark reality is that I am now as closer to my parent’s generation, than to that of someone leaving University.
In a desperate bid to still feel vaguely attached to a youthful age I am currently scouring application forms and surveys where I can tick a box labled Age : 20 - 39. I can do this for 3 days only!
I never thought my actual chronological age would bother me, but clearly it does. It is surely no coincidence that I started blogging 2 weeks before my 40th. There is a danger that instead of becomming more responsible post 40, I will have contra reaction and start to behave more erratically. I may even consider a tattoo, although it may well just say “Best before Feb 2007″
All joking aside, turning 40 has made me reflect. My main regret is that I took so long to get to grips with who I really am, and I will never get that time back. I must endeavour to make sure the 2nd half of my life, living as I always wanted to be, are the most fulfilled and cherished years of my life.
Posted by Jenny Harvey (Still in her 30s)

Posted in Getting Closer, Looking Back | 1 Comment »

Kylie Minogue on Valentine’s Day and Turning 40

From the Daily Mail 

Lonely Kylie Minogue wasn’t looking forward to waking up this morning.

The unlucky-in-love singer said in an interview published today: “I’m ignoring Valentine’s Day.”

Although sources have linked Kylie to her ex-lover Olivier Martinez again in the last few weeks, it seems the singer is shunning all things romantic as she spends this Valentine’s with her female friends.

Kylie says she’s ignoring Valentine’s Day and will be spending the evening with her friends

Kylie has made no secret of the fact she’s desperate to find the love of her life, settle down and have a family. She has been quoted as saying: “That’s still something I would love to happen.”

But she said: “I honestly don’t have a feeling one way or the other if I will ever walk town the aisle.”

So today of all days can’t be easy for the singer.

She revealed: “I’m boycotting it all, what’s the point because I’ve nobody special in my life at the moment. I will be celebrating with my girlfriend instead because it’s her birthday…so not your traditional Valentine’s Day.”

And it’s not just this Hallmark day that makes her want to reach for the Kleenex. The former Neighbours star, who scooped Woman of the Year at the Elle Style Awards earlier this week, is turning 40 on 28 May but she’d rather think of anything else right now.

She added: “I’m not looking forward to my 40th but I guess I have to get excited about it. I’m a rubbish party planner so normally I don’t bother, but I guess I have to this time round, I’ll just get my pal William [Baker] to help.”

Kylie also confessed: “I don’t want a huge party, I just want a few friends round. I mean turning 40 isn’t really something to celebrate is it? I’d rather ignore it.”

Posted in Celebs | No Comments »

Taking Chances at 40

From The Daily Pilot

Women older than 40 today are mothers, daughters, executives, friends, business owners, wives and lovers.

Statistics show they’re also beautiful, healthy, active, empowered and happy with who they are, maybe for the first time in their lives.

Lillian Williams, one of 10 finalists in the MORE/Wilhemina 40+ Model Search contest, said attitude is everything, and she wasn’t there at age 20.

It took turning 40 to give her the confidence she needed to accept who she was, embrace her life choices — mistakes included — and feel good enough about herself to believe she could enter a modeling competition.

“At 20, you’re immature and you don’t know what life is about. Now, I’m not going to be influenced by what other people think,” Williams said.

The Costa Mesa resident is one of three California women in the annual nationwide model search sponsored by MORE Magazine and Wilhemina Models that began late last year.

Williams is a dental assistant in Newport Beach and a regular reader of MORE magazine, a publication geared toward women older than 40.

Lois Johnson, beauty and fashion director of MORE Magazine, said each of the more than 15,000 readers who entered the contest are winners.

“This is a community of intelligent, highly evolved women who are taking charge of their lives and enjoying being 40 and over,” Johnson said.

“Right now, most readers say that while they would enter a model search, they might not have ever considered that in their 20s.”

Women today have a different attitude, Johnson said, coupled with the fact that women are learning to take exceptional care of themselves by working out, not baking in the sun anymore, whitening their teeth and paying special attention to skin care.

After seeing the ad in the magazine for the model search, Williams and her sister joined more than 400 women at the open audition in September at the Talbots store in South Coast Plaza.

Williams filled out an application, had her hair and makeup touched up by experts, and posed for a professional photo that she submitted with her application.

Everyone there that day helped her feel comfortable and at ease, Williams said, enabling her to step out of her comfort zone and try new things, like talking more about herself.

Once she was selected as a semifinalist, she was required to submit a two-minute video in which she had to talk about herself and her life.

“I’ve always been very reserved, and now I want to say who I am, and embrace what God gave me.”

Williams is tall, something she struggled with when she was younger. She wouldn’t wear heels, she felt left out, and it played havoc with her self esteem.

Since entering the contest, Williams said meeting new people, seeing her friends and family so supportive, and having a little attention focused on her at this stage in her life isn’t such a bad thing.

“Why not do this? It’s a way of expressing something that deep down all of us want to do, to feel appreciated in life.”

Williams leaves Monday for New York, where the first-, second- and third-place winners of the contest will be announced at a fashion show and dinner at the Hotel QT in Manhattan on Wednesday.

All three finalists will receive modeling contracts with Wilhelmina, be featured in the June issue of MORE and appear on an upcoming segment of the “Today” show.

A shopping spree, jewelry, hair and makeup products and trips are all part of the winning package.

Williams has never been to New York, and she said that whether or not she wins, the experience has been one she will never forget.

Her son, Zachary, 11, has been behind her 110%, she said, telling her she can do it, and that if she wins, she can do whatever she wants.

That’s something Williams wouldn’t have believed 20 years ago, and if she does win, she’ll be able to put that advice to the test.

She may have to quit her job. After all, she’ll have to honor a $50,000 modeling contract.

“I’ve never modeled before, but I’m willing to learn anything now, and I’ll weigh all the options,” Williams said.

“This is the opportunity of a lifetime.”

Posted in Getting Better with Time, New Outlook | No Comments »

Make New Friends, but Keep the Old

By Todd Barrett Lieman

I always wondered, which is silver and which is gold? I don’t really like gold. So maybe one should be platinum. That would have more personal impact. But then I’m still left to ponder which is which. Certainly, platinum is worth more than silver. Some of my new friends are clearly worth more than my older friends. It’s all so confusing.

You see I’ve been having these quite vivid dreams about old friends. These are people that I haven’t spoken with in years. People who were once very good friends and are now just memories. On the one hand, I feel sad that I’m not really that close to some of these people anymore. But, on the other hand? Well, I can be realistic about the fact that friends sometimes come in and out of our lives. I think the fact that I’m turning 40 (oh so soon) has me constantly reminiscing about the last decade (and then some).

When I fall asleep, I think the dark recesses of my soul are telling me that I should get back in touch with a few of these friends. There is a common denominator to these friends about whom I’ve been dreaming. Aside from the fact that I’m bothered that we aren’t friends anymore, I’m more bothered by the fact that I think I was “wronged” by each of them. Our “falling out,” or “falling away” was caused by actions taken by these friends. These actions ultimately drove a wedge of separation that now has me dreaming about reconciliation.

But, is that the right thing to do? After all, in their absence, we’ve made new friends. Sometimes even better friends. Certainly friends who are more in touch with the ever-changing times of my life (and, I suppose, vice versa). I have some friends who will never, ever go away. I can pick up the phone and call (after years) and we can pick up as if we had been talking every Sunday. I don’t ever worry about those friends. I’m talking about friends that just *poof* disappeared. Something stupid was said and that was that.

I’ve long considered myself a pretty good friend. I have always been the guy that made the bigger efforts to stay in touch; never the guy who says, “but I called last.” I have always been the guy that would pull out the plastic and pick up the tab after a spectacularly fun evening. And, I have always been the guy that would make the tough phone calls in times of need. (Or, in one particular instance, the guy who would put up bail and go wait for my friend to “get out” in the most horrid of conditions.) I’ve never been the guy that blew off friends for relationships and so on.

Parenting brings incredible challenges in time management. And, the time only grows more scarce as the kids get older and the wide variety of activities get thrown into the mix. As a result, I think it’s important that I/we maximize what time we have by participating in the activities and adventures we love with the people we love. This, of course, means that it’s harder to maintain relationships with friends who are “work.” – regardless of how much history we have with them. When kids come into the picture, “history” is no longer enough of a reason for “effort.” When kids come into play, the friends who stick around do so because they “get it,” (and vice versa) and new friends are found because our kids are in the same schools, programs or whatever.

In the meantime, what to do with those few friends that do fall out of the day-to-day existence, but not quite off the radar altogether? I really don’t know. Certainly, if they came back into the fold, I’d find the time to stay in touch. Maybe I’ll just make the effort one last time. An email can’t hurt, right?

Posted in Relationships | No Comments »

MONI’QUE HITS HER SEXUAL PEAK

Actress MONIQUE loved turning 40 - because the older she is, the better her sex life gets. The larger-than-life star hit the landmark age in December (07), and she is already reaping the benefits. She explains her midlife joy: “I’m experiencing something so different and liberating. “Everybody says 40 is the new 20. But I don’t want it to be the new 20. Everything is so better now. At 20, sexually, you don’t know what you’re doing. You look for it, you find it, you lose it a few times.”

http://www.1monique.com/

Posted in Celebs | No Comments »

How Turning 40 Changes Relationships

by Chicklet“Thanks for buying me guitar books for my birthday.”

“You’re welcome. I just want you to have fun with it.”

“I know you don’t mean it, but I love you for saying it anyway.”

“No, I really DO want you to have fun with it!”

[looking at me quite sheepishly…] “I hope it doesn’t horrify you that I bought a guitar for my 40th birthday…”

“It doesn’t HORRIFY me. It just freaks me out. A LOT.”

Posted in Relationships | No Comments »

How to Turn 40 and Have a Great Time Doing It

by Colette French

So many people get discouraged as they begin to get older. However, it is very important for us to learn to grow old gracefully because at each season in our lives, we have something new and wonderful to discover about ourselves and to offer others. Turning 40 for many is really hard, but there are some fun things you can do to make turning 40 pretty exciting.

Step One

Plan to do something on your 40th birthday that you’ve never done before, but have always wanted to do. Make sure it’s something you’ll always remember.

Step Two

Start a fun and exciting new hobby. If you’ve always wanted to play tennis or play the piano but never got around to it then go for it. for it. You are never too old to keep learning and try something new.

Step Three

Learn a new exotic dance from a different culture. You will have great fun dancing while exercising at the same time.

Step Four

Get dressed up and go to an Opera or a play that interest you.

Step Five

Learn a new exotic language and go visit the country of the new language you’ve learned.

Posted in Celebrating | No Comments »

Forty Things I’ve Done Before Turning Forty by Lucinda

In my blog wanderings and perusals over the past three years, I’ve seen many lists of “Forty Things to do Before I Turn Forty.” By the time I thought of composing my own, my time was seriously running out, and I was faced with either making a list of “Forty Things to Accomplish in the Next Nine Minutes” or of finding a creative alternative. (Allow me to offer a small bit of advice: given a choice between Lots of Potentially Emotionally Unhinging Work or a Creative Alternative, go for the latter.)

My alternative to the “Forty Things to do Before I Turn Forty” list? It needed to be something positive, something affirming, something that would help me appreciate the life I’ve had already and the one I have now rather than laying on the pressure to do more, accomplish more, be more. I needed not a list of things to do, but a list of wonderful things I have done in my first forty years, a list of appreciation and celebration. Therefore…

Forty Things I’ve Done Before Turning Forty

1. Learned to see God as a very real and compassionate Person rather than a Lurker with a Big Board.

2. Convinced my brother to willingly eat mud.

3. Slept in trees.

4. Jumped out of a barn loft.

5. Earned a writing degree, had success with creative pieces, publication, readings, two Pushcart nominations and served a week long term as Poet in Residence at Bryan College.

6. Been proposed to or seriously co-considered marriage five times.

7. Had a sixth man fall to his knees dramatically before me in a public place, spread his arms wide and sing loudly, “Besa me! Besa me mucho!”

8. Promptly married him.

9. Stayed married 17 years to the above to date.

10. Gave birth to two children with a midwife presiding and no meds.

11. Learned to enjoy poetry. Learned to detest poetry. Learned I can’t live without poetry.

12. Enjoyed mathematical theory.

13. Pieced and hand-quilted a quilt from dress scraps.

14. Found out what happens when one puts one end of an electrical cord in one’s mouth while the other end is still in the outlet.

15. Learned to cook, yea, even unto a complete Thanksgiving meal for company.

16. Played the piano and the oboe.

17. Walked barefoot through snow.

18. Danced.

19. Put my brother in a tractor tire, rolled him down a hill and survived my mother’s wrath afterward.

20. Attended wonderful Renaissance festivals.

21. Played the lead onstage in “Once Upon a Mattress.”

22. Sang a solo in Handel’s Messiah.

23. Learned to live without medication for an affective disorder–something a diagnosing doctor said I would never do.

24. Lived amid a passion for learning.

25. Discovered a passion for teaching.

26. Learned to live in the midst of prayer.

27. Made peace with an ongoing and difficult relationship from my past.

28. Learned where I fit in my family.

29. Read thousands of astounding, wonderful books.

30. Tutored and taught writing to amazing people.

31. Moderated for the beautiful ladies of LHM’s Lighthouse and Covenant Women for several years.

32. Given up an addictive and self-destructive way of “coping.”

33. Found the courage to keep/enforce my own boundaries while remaining unruffled.

34. Learned jewelry making.

35. Mentored some incredible young women.

36. Learned to recognize and name flowers, trees and other native plants.

37. Taken up yoga.

38. Kindled a love of books in two children.

39. Laughed nearly every day.

40. Been a student of grace.

More from Lucinda 

Posted in 40 Things | 3 Comments »

Facing Forty Forthrightly by Dan Jarrard

For many, turning forty is a dreaded day. Somehow a stigma has been associated with it that has resulted in some individuals spending days in mourning. Thousands of men and women each year allow the marketing industry to impress a depressing anticipation into their attitudes and actions. That being, that turning forty is a dreaded moment that influences all the days to follow in a negative manner. It has even been reported that on occasions, depressed individuals have resorted to alarming measures.

This book is about life, and a part of life is accepting the fact of aging to be ingrained within the process of living. The time that is spent in living is an investment. We can choose to make this investment with growling and complaints or we can choose to make it with grins and compliments. Regardless of which path we choose to travel, of this we can be certain - Time Is Never Regained.

In Facing Forty (or any age) Forthrightly, author Dan Jarrard presents 5 areas that will greatly assist in making the life-journey more successful.

Take Time To MEDITATE: it is the PATH TO VIRTUE
Take Time To Be HEALTHY: it is the SECRET OF YOUTH
Take Time To LAUGH: it is the MUSIC OF THE SOUL
Take Time To Be FRIENDLY: it is the KEY TO FRIENDSHIP
Take Time To DREAM: it is the HITCHINGPOST FOR BALANCE

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Men Turning 40—What It’s Really Like

With the right attitude, this decade can be enriching and invigorating

“Your sex appeal is history.” “Might as well toss that sports equipment.” Your buddies are happy to pepper you with these myths as you approach the big Four-O, but here’s the truth: a man’s 40s can be a great time of life.

“These years are life-changing, not life-ending,” says clinical social worker Bruce Curry of Lehigh Valley Hospital and Health Network. “You might not have the same feeling of invincibility you had in your 20s and 30s, but you can feel more confident and content.” Here’s how to reach that comfort level:

Pay attention to your health. “Young men tend to ignore it, but it’s important to focus on health now to prevent problems later,” says internist Gregory Stout, D.O., of Lehigh Valley Hospital and Health Network. That’s especially true if you have conditions like heart disease in your family. Get your cholesterol and blood pressure checked, watch your weight, and give up unhealthy habits like smoking.

Take a new approach to sports. You might not be able to keep up with 20-year-olds on the basketball court, but you can keep your competitive juices flowing in an over-40 league—or in a new sport, like golf.

Have realistic goals. It’s the key to avoiding a midlife crisis. “If you’re not the tycoon you thought you’d be by age 40, adjust your expectations or you’re in for a fall,” Curry says.

Be proud of your career achievements. You’ve worked hard to establish yourself and now might be a manager or shop foreman. Explore how you might use the skills and experience you’ve gained to help younger co-workers.

Spend time with your family. Don’t keep putting off that ski trip you promised your children—they’ll be grown before you know it. Stay attuned to your partner’s feelings as she makes her own midlife transition. And learn from your parents, who can help prepare you for a rich life well beyond 40.

Get involved in your community. Whether it’s coaching a children’s soccer team or helping clean up the local park, you’ll broaden your circle and enrich your life.

Want to Know More? For a list of 10 top health tips for men and a schedule of regular checkups you need, call 610-402-CARE, or click here.

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