Turning 40 by Jon
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Are You Turning 40 and Looking for a Profound Life Change?
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This month’s theme is turning 40 and doing all the stupid things I can do to fight back the clock. Recently, I started to date … again. However, the object of my attraction is younger, much younger. I would judge older guys who would “prey” on a younger, inexperienced woman; now I found myself in this untenable situation. Not to say that a younger woman is necessarily vulnerable or naïve or dating me because of some pathological defect. I forget to mention her age on purpose, because I feel somewhat creepy. Nonetheless, I’m hitting forty, and am quite unsure as to how I should feel about this milestone. One year ago, I bought two motorcycles – cruiser and sport bike – in order to go really, really, fast. Living in Japan, I don’t want to go really, really, fast due to the narrow streets and the congested traffic conditions. So, I decide to work out as much as possible trying to get my ideal body again.
Therefore, I ran 12 miles last weekend and plan to an additional 12 this weekend. I am truly pathetic. I have become that guy I vowed never to be. I guess what I’m saying is that there are age-related fears and customs that permeate every American male irrespective of his race, social-economic status, or marital status. I have fallen deeply into one of those chasms and it scares the living shit out of me. I never wanted to be the guy that dates a 23-year-old (I guess I mentioned her age), rides motorcycles dangerously, and chases his ideal body image of total virility. But, I am indeed that fellow now and fully understand the urge to stay younger and exuberant. Therefore, learning to resist the urge to judge another is something I take to heart. Never judge another person without first fully understanding his motivation, fears, and challenges. I have resolved myself to being happy, no matter what situation in which I find myself. I have made stupid mistakes, careless mistakes, and out-right hurtful mistakes to others. Time is the ultimate judge of what we do and living with the consequences of our actions is truly being mature and manly. I hope to continue to live and learn. http://blog.myspace.com/69999856
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